Poor fool! You've stumbled into my motherfucking lair. Don't you goddamn know? This is Enraged Baboon Headquarters, the Internet's most famous place where I talk about shit I either find: (a) funny; (b) retarded; or (c) both. For instance, you. You fit all three of those categories. Or is that just the third? I don't even care. You just suck, is all. And you're going to die. In the meantime, read some of my stuff. I think it is sweet. And whatever I think is just so fucking correct. It's not even funny. Except it is. Funny, that is. I'm like the Jerry Seinfeld of the Internet. Except not Jewish. Or named Jerry. Plus I'm pretty sure Jerry has the Internet.
Here are some opinions I made up when I was bored.